32 years
My kid, 3 years old is having fears Santa. Sometimes he says he's afraid without any reason even if nothing changes in his situation. Any help?
Dec 26, 2015
Everyone experiences anxieties and fears at one time or another. Feeling anxious in a particularly uncomfortable situation never feels very good. However, with kids, such feelings are not only normal, they're also necessary for their character development. Dealing with anxieties can prepare children to accustom themselves to face challenging situations in life.
And correlating this question to your other question, your child's fears may be deliberately exaggerated as part of his attempts to gain as much attention from you as possible because he's feeling jealous of his baby sister.
Anxiety is defined as "apprehension without apparent cause." It usually occurs when there's no immediate threat to a person's safety or well-being, but the threat feels real. Kids between the ages 4 through 6 years have anxiety about things that aren't based in reality, such as fears of monsters and ghosts, or Santa Claus in your child’s case – something which is not uncommon. A fear of Santa is common and normal among children, typically from ages 2 to 7 years. It's important to see things from your little one's perspective: he might be afraid of Santa for a number of reasons. Some kids don't like his white beard, his gloves, or his red suit. Others might be afraid of his odd vocabulary (Ho! Ho! Ho!), or Santa's noisy grotto environment, and the pressure of being “good” to get a present are likely to contribute to a scary experience. The fear of Santa is similar to the common fear of clowns. And, of course, plenty of kids are fearful simply because they're expected to talk to a complete stranger and possibly sit on his lap.
Toddlers have vivid imaginations and find it difficult to separate between what's real and what's pretend. Never force your child to interact with someone he is afraid of, and consider having people in costumes remove their masks to reassure him there is a friendly face inside. You can also help your child adjust to the idea of people in costumes by playing dress-up with him.
To help your child deal with fears and anxieties:
· Acknowledge that the fear is real. As trivial as a fear may seem, it feels real to your child and it's causing him to feel anxious and afraid. Being able to talk about fears helps — if you talk about it, it can become less powerful.
· Never belittle the fear as a way of forcing your child to overcome it. Saying, "Don't be silly! Santa is in no way scary!" won't make the fear go away.
· Don't cater to fears, though. This will just reinforce the source of their fear and that these sources should be avoided. Provide support and gentle care as you approach the feared object or situation with your child.
· Teach your child how to rate fear. A child who can visualize the intensity of the fear on a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being the strongest, may be able to "see" the fear as less intense than first imagined. Younger kids can think about how "full of fear" they are, with being full "up to my knees" as not so scared, "up to my stomach" as more frightened, and "up to my head" as truly petrified.
And correlating this question to your other question, your child's fears may be deliberately exaggerated as part of his attempts to gain as much attention from you as possible because he's feeling jealous of his baby sister.
Anxiety is defined as "apprehension without apparent cause." It usually occurs when there's no immediate threat to a person's safety or well-being, but the threat feels real. Kids between the ages 4 through 6 years have anxiety about things that aren't based in reality, such as fears of monsters and ghosts, or Santa Claus in your child’s case – something which is not uncommon. A fear of Santa is common and normal among children, typically from ages 2 to 7 years. It's important to see things from your little one's perspective: he might be afraid of Santa for a number of reasons. Some kids don't like his white beard, his gloves, or his red suit. Others might be afraid of his odd vocabulary (Ho! Ho! Ho!), or Santa's noisy grotto environment, and the pressure of being “good” to get a present are likely to contribute to a scary experience. The fear of Santa is similar to the common fear of clowns. And, of course, plenty of kids are fearful simply because they're expected to talk to a complete stranger and possibly sit on his lap.
Toddlers have vivid imaginations and find it difficult to separate between what's real and what's pretend. Never force your child to interact with someone he is afraid of, and consider having people in costumes remove their masks to reassure him there is a friendly face inside. You can also help your child adjust to the idea of people in costumes by playing dress-up with him.
To help your child deal with fears and anxieties:
· Acknowledge that the fear is real. As trivial as a fear may seem, it feels real to your child and it's causing him to feel anxious and afraid. Being able to talk about fears helps — if you talk about it, it can become less powerful.
· Never belittle the fear as a way of forcing your child to overcome it. Saying, "Don't be silly! Santa is in no way scary!" won't make the fear go away.
· Don't cater to fears, though. This will just reinforce the source of their fear and that these sources should be avoided. Provide support and gentle care as you approach the feared object or situation with your child.
· Teach your child how to rate fear. A child who can visualize the intensity of the fear on a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being the strongest, may be able to "see" the fear as less intense than first imagined. Younger kids can think about how "full of fear" they are, with being full "up to my knees" as not so scared, "up to my stomach" as more frightened, and "up to my head" as truly petrified.
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