4 years
My child hates to eat! We spend hours to finish a plate, and he only wants to eat rice everyday. Is that ok?
Jul 22, 2015
Picky eating in children usually starts becoming a problem about the time is 12 months of age, because this is when children begin to feed on their own. The fact that children now have a say in what and how much to eat gives them a sense of control over their lives. So some days they may have a large appetite and eat a lot of everything, while on other days they may not seem to eat much at all.
Another important factor to keep in mind in that the rate of growth, while fast and significant during the first year of life, it slows down in the second year. Toddlers are also learning lots of new skills, like talking, walking, running, climbing, and more. During a time of great change, children often want as much “sameness” as possible, including sticking to the same small group of foods. This consistency can help them feel safe and secure during a period of rapid change.
As a parent, you should be realistic and knowledgeable about your own expectations about how much their toddler “should” eat. It would not make sense to expect a toddler to eat a large amount of food at each meal every single day; after all, the size of the stomach of a toddler does not exceed the size of his clenched fist.
Parents are responsible for providing healthy foods, while children are responsible for what and how much they eat. This helps establish the understanding of what it feels like to be hungry and then full, so that they eat when hungry and stop when full.
So, as a parent, how can you encourage your child to enjoy a range of foods?
Choose to eat a range of healthy foods yourself: your own choices of food have to be
similar to the foods you want your child to eat and enjoy.
Invite your child to prepare meals together: when your child contributes to making a
meal, this will increase the likelihood that he will taste his own “creation.”
When tasting new food items, make sure you do not express dislike or disgust: there is a study that showed that mothers who had facial expressions, body language or words implying that they didn’t want to try a new food, their children also tended to refuse new foods. And if you are a “picky eater” yourself, then your young child is likely to imitate you in this behavior, similar to the way he imitates the way you talk on the phone for example.
You may be wondering what makes your child so choosy when it comes to food, insisting on eating only rice. Here are some of the most common causes of picky eating and ideas for proper responses:
1- Some children are sensitive to the taste, smell or texture of food. You can:
>Offer several healthy food choices from the ones your child does like at each meal.
>Introduce new kinds of foods gently but frequently. Children need to be offered a new
food as many as 10-15 times before they will eat it.
>Monitor your child’s particular food sensitivities and keep them in mind when preparing meals. So let’s say your child dislikes big chunks of meat, then make sure you make it more “mushy”.
2- Some children’s temperament renders them less inclined to try new things, because this is how approach the world. You can:
>Place new food items next to foods your child already likes. Encourage him to touch, smell, lick, or taste the new food.
>Do not fall into the trap of preparing special meals for your child. But at the same time, make sure that at each meal, there is something he knows and likes on the plate. Also give him what the rest of the family is eating in toddler-sized portions. With time and persistence, he will grow more familiar and accepting of these choice.
>Use healthy dips such as yogurt to encourage your child to eat fruits, vegetables, and meats.
3- Some children can seem “picky” because they want to feed themselves. You can:
>Offer safe “finger foods” like fish fingers.
>Allow your child to hold the spoon while you’re feeding him to allow a sense of being
in control.
>Let your child decide where foods go on his plate, and maybe allow him to pour food into his plate, with your assistance.
4- Some children are very active, they cannot remain seated for long. You can:
>Set your child’s meal out before he sits down.
>Make sure that mealtimes do not last for long: a good 10 minutes or so is enough. Let your child get up when he indicates he is finished eating.
>Make healthy foods available and within your child’s reach, such as a bowl of apples or bananas, so when he gets hungry he can easily get to good foods on the go.
What NOT to Do about Picky Eating
Two major big pitfalls exist in dealing with picky eaters that you need to watch out for and avoid in order to encourage healthy eating behavior:
1- Forcing your child to eat: this practice usually leads to the child eating less. Forcing also accustoms children to rely on others to tell them how much to eat and what they are feeling. This practice also does not teach the child to develop healthy eating habits or good self-esteem.
2- Nagging or making deals with your child: saying things like “Just two more bites, just two more bites!” “If you eat your vegetables, you will get dessert.” These are self-defeating strategies. Also, never use desert as a reward - this will make desert the center of focus of your child, and instead of him eating healthy meals, he will save space for desert. Moreover, children who learn to make deals about eating quickly learn to make deals and ask for rewards for doing other things. And soon enough, they will refuse to do anything if no reward exists.
Another important factor to keep in mind in that the rate of growth, while fast and significant during the first year of life, it slows down in the second year. Toddlers are also learning lots of new skills, like talking, walking, running, climbing, and more. During a time of great change, children often want as much “sameness” as possible, including sticking to the same small group of foods. This consistency can help them feel safe and secure during a period of rapid change.
As a parent, you should be realistic and knowledgeable about your own expectations about how much their toddler “should” eat. It would not make sense to expect a toddler to eat a large amount of food at each meal every single day; after all, the size of the stomach of a toddler does not exceed the size of his clenched fist.
Parents are responsible for providing healthy foods, while children are responsible for what and how much they eat. This helps establish the understanding of what it feels like to be hungry and then full, so that they eat when hungry and stop when full.
So, as a parent, how can you encourage your child to enjoy a range of foods?
Choose to eat a range of healthy foods yourself: your own choices of food have to be
similar to the foods you want your child to eat and enjoy.
Invite your child to prepare meals together: when your child contributes to making a
meal, this will increase the likelihood that he will taste his own “creation.”
When tasting new food items, make sure you do not express dislike or disgust: there is a study that showed that mothers who had facial expressions, body language or words implying that they didn’t want to try a new food, their children also tended to refuse new foods. And if you are a “picky eater” yourself, then your young child is likely to imitate you in this behavior, similar to the way he imitates the way you talk on the phone for example.
You may be wondering what makes your child so choosy when it comes to food, insisting on eating only rice. Here are some of the most common causes of picky eating and ideas for proper responses:
1- Some children are sensitive to the taste, smell or texture of food. You can:
>Offer several healthy food choices from the ones your child does like at each meal.
>Introduce new kinds of foods gently but frequently. Children need to be offered a new
food as many as 10-15 times before they will eat it.
>Monitor your child’s particular food sensitivities and keep them in mind when preparing meals. So let’s say your child dislikes big chunks of meat, then make sure you make it more “mushy”.
2- Some children’s temperament renders them less inclined to try new things, because this is how approach the world. You can:
>Place new food items next to foods your child already likes. Encourage him to touch, smell, lick, or taste the new food.
>Do not fall into the trap of preparing special meals for your child. But at the same time, make sure that at each meal, there is something he knows and likes on the plate. Also give him what the rest of the family is eating in toddler-sized portions. With time and persistence, he will grow more familiar and accepting of these choice.
>Use healthy dips such as yogurt to encourage your child to eat fruits, vegetables, and meats.
3- Some children can seem “picky” because they want to feed themselves. You can:
>Offer safe “finger foods” like fish fingers.
>Allow your child to hold the spoon while you’re feeding him to allow a sense of being
in control.
>Let your child decide where foods go on his plate, and maybe allow him to pour food into his plate, with your assistance.
4- Some children are very active, they cannot remain seated for long. You can:
>Set your child’s meal out before he sits down.
>Make sure that mealtimes do not last for long: a good 10 minutes or so is enough. Let your child get up when he indicates he is finished eating.
>Make healthy foods available and within your child’s reach, such as a bowl of apples or bananas, so when he gets hungry he can easily get to good foods on the go.
What NOT to Do about Picky Eating
Two major big pitfalls exist in dealing with picky eaters that you need to watch out for and avoid in order to encourage healthy eating behavior:
1- Forcing your child to eat: this practice usually leads to the child eating less. Forcing also accustoms children to rely on others to tell them how much to eat and what they are feeling. This practice also does not teach the child to develop healthy eating habits or good self-esteem.
2- Nagging or making deals with your child: saying things like “Just two more bites, just two more bites!” “If you eat your vegetables, you will get dessert.” These are self-defeating strategies. Also, never use desert as a reward - this will make desert the center of focus of your child, and instead of him eating healthy meals, he will save space for desert. Moreover, children who learn to make deals about eating quickly learn to make deals and ask for rewards for doing other things. And soon enough, they will refuse to do anything if no reward exists.
•
